| Hi. I can't give you any help with what your niece should expect, but others here will. Welcome. I can advise, though, that your support will be invaluable to her, even if she appears sometimes to resent it. It can be so frustrating to depend on others to speak for you and her emotions will be all over the place. She will surprise you with her stoicism, but she will also, rightly and understandably, feel angry, sad, scared and many other things. Please let her feel those things and let her know that she can ask to be on her own sometimes and should not be made to feel guilty for wanting that. It doesn't mean she doesn't appreciate your help and support, but we all need our space at times. Always remember, she is who she was three weeks ago and yesterday. She hasn't suddenly become an invalid, or small child , completely dependent on others. For a few weeks, she will be dependent, first on medical staff, then on family and friends, but not as dependent as you might think, or, indeed, want/need, yourselves, for her to be. My sister, desperate to make my life easier and to do SOMETHING, anything, to make a difference, forgot that a week or so ago. She was trying to help and to relieve me of any worry, but she made a decision, on my behalf, without first consulting me. It wasn't a big deal and it's fine, now, but she simply forgot that I'm still me and make my own decisions and have my own way of doing things, for a while. Good luck to your niece. It's tough, but she'll get through it and, as I said, there are many here who will help with any specific issues, or simply just to "listen" |
