Hi, I'm new to forums and message boards, and could use some really good advice. Everyone here is very supportive of each other, and unfortunately, you all have so much experience with this dreaded disease. I hope someone can help me think logically vs emotionally, by virtue of your own experiences. Sorry ahead of time for the length.

In a nutshell, I am on a rollercoaster of emotions, hopefully unnecessarily. I am 40+, female, nonsmoker with a family history or oral cancer. (Father, teen smoker for 4yrs, non-smoker 35 years when diagnosed, two years aggressive treatment) Five years ago I showed my dentist a hard, pea size, painless lump in my right cheek. He sent me to an ENT who thought it was a lymph node, nothing to worry about but watched it. No change in all this time. Seven weeks ago the dentist noticed a change in size and a change (hardening and spreading) in surrounding tissue. I felt it 4 weeks prior but knew I was going in for a cleaning. My ENT did the same exam, confirmed the tissue change, but wants to wait another 4 months and record size again. Against my gut feel, I took his advice to wait it out and after a week or so successfully shelved it in the back of my mind. Four weeks ago I started with a hard time swallowing, like a lump in my throat, then graduated to a sore throat and stiff neck. Some days worse than others and warranting a heat pad, but always there and on the right side. I hand't changed any pillows, but chalked the sore throat/swallow problem up to a virus.(I have young children) About 10 days later I was sitting with my chin in my hand at the counter, and felt it: a painless "knot" the size of a small grape in the cheek tissue of my lower right mandible, directly below the node in my cheek. There is a 1/2" space where one starts and one ends. The lump in my jaw is now larger than when I first discovered it, maybe double in size, Definitely nothing like this on the left side. I began having headaches early on, and while they are not debilitating, I know it's there.
Needless to say, my concern is growing. Is there really a correlation, or is it just my mind running amok? Does this sound like anything I should be concerned about now? Would there be any correlation between my "symptoms" or is it just my imagination? I really don't know where to go from here-in part for fear of being blown off. If I do go to the ENT, what do I ask for in the way of testing?
Any info you can share would be GREATLY appreciated. Thank you in advance.
Marty

Marty, Hello and WELCOME to RDOC....The HONEST place to come for answers,,,or questions,,,,or just to hang out... I can tell by your post that you like the Dentist that you go to since you have been going to him for "SO" many years,,,however you seriously NEED to get to another DOCTOR and "SOON"! I am not trying to scare you but you should be scared,,, THIS IS NOTHING TO WAIT ON ---WAIT FOR-----There have been "SOOOOOO" many cases where they have waited and it was too late.....There have been "SOOOOO" many cases where they trusted "THAT" doctor and no one else and they wish now that they have seeked another opinion......I am one of those....PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get another Doctor to look at this...They should run some scans to see what, where , how big. They should be taking blood tests,,,,,there is so much they can do to "RULE" out CANCER or to tell you YES it is CANCER...I truly am not trying to scare you-----I just want you to go and make DAMN sure that this is not CANCER....And after all these years---FIND OUT WHAT THE HELL IT IS?????? Let us know....ALways Vicki Lynn

Hi VickieLynn;
Thanks for taking the time to reply so quickly, for the encouragement, and the warm welcome!! I appreciate your candor. I needed someone "outside" my comfort zone to be objective and share their opinion based on THEIR experience, and mine. I'm familiar with your story--you are one courageous woman.

I do love my dentist-he is awesome. Besides my dentiest, he's been a friend many years. He's very concerned and wants a second opinion. You and he think alike; he gave me the same opinion almost word for word, about not waiting so it's not too late, and a second opinion, etc. He's had 3 patients in the last 10 months in this situation, 2 of whom stayed with their ENT they'liked' and waited for a change in size without further testing. One is no longer here, the other is not faring well, the third had surgery/chemo/rad with a good prognosis. So, he's not comfortable alled him after I saw the ENT last, he wasn'ts not comfortable with the ENT waiting a few more months, but gave me the name of another ENT in case I decided to seek further advice. (I haven't even told him of this new development.) My husband knows my currrent ENT and really likes him, so much so that he gets offended when I mention a second opinion with another dr. He can't believe I don't take his word or diagnosis as gosopel. Although the ENT is a head/neck surgeon, he told me initially that a ct wouldn't show anything. He does know my family history and knew my father. He asked "how concerned are you?" Very concerned, and I want it out. was my answer. He then said he didn't think it was anything and let's wait. I felt that was a 'loaded question' and his laise' faire attitude made me look as though I'm "worked up" over nothing. I'm never sick, never had any major health issues, and have just realized I've given myself all the reasons to get ANOTHER ENT involved. (yea me!!) If I would need any type of treatment or surgery I wouldn't want the first ENT to do it, even if he were the one to diagnose it down the road. That's a battle I'll wage with my husband if and when I need to fight the war. I just don't feel comfortable with him, and I know that's a red flag, no matter what the situation.
My neck is very stiff today, and I have a pretty good headache. I'm not touching this thing for fear it'll get bigger if I keep pressing on it and, in part, it'll feel bigger on it's own. I guess I'll get through the weekend with heat pads and Advil.
Would this disomfort have anything to do with my lump? I am smart enough NOT to symptom search on the net, and am grateful to have found this site. I know it carries useful true information.
Thanks again for your help Vickie Lynn. It made me feel better, knowing I'm not alone.(I felt very much alone) I have small children, and last night I played the 'what if' game in my mind. That's not like me becuase it's such a waste of time.
I hope you're doing well. Any more info would be great!!
Marty

Martymouse.
Please ensure that you do get the best guidance possible here and go for every scan and test you can.
My worries were dismissed by my local Doctor when I complained of a lump on the right side of my tongue and an earache the same side. I was given some sudafed and co-proxamyl and told not to read too much into what I thought was more serious. For the next month I was'nt taken seriously untill, in pain I took myself to hospital where I was examined by an ENT Doctor. To cut a long story short, I was asked back in for a biopsy, and within a week was diagnosed with tongue Carcinoma and cancerous nodes in my neck, one of which had become a prominent lump.
Fortunately, I have now recovered from treatment and although not as good as new.... am very much better.
I hope your worries are unfounded...but don't leave yourself in any doubt.
Let us know how you get on. Steve

Hi Marty, Vickies right go have another biopsy done straight away dont leave it on trust of you GP , I did and to my regret am a regular on here now
But I do like it he he

Paul

Marty the guys on hear know what they are talking about.

I first went to the GP with a lump he said it was mumps, a visit 2 weeks later another GP sent me to hospital the E M Unit and a ENT Dr refused to let me go home until a consultant had seen me in the morning.

I was lucky but it did not end the 1st biposy was inconcluisive and a consultant decided off his cuff without an appointment to send to his mate the Senior ENT man and hey presto the lymph gland was sweeling becuase of a tonsil.

Here I am 19 days after treatment getting on with my life. The treatemnt has taken 5 moths though.

Best to get it checked it maybe nothing but insist and a senior third opinion just in case and if its nothing nasty then smile and enjoy the day.

Steve, Paul and Nigel;
Thank you all so much for your helpful, encouraging responses. They have been of great comfort to me, knowing I can come here for accurate information, "I've been there" experiences and a sense of direction. Until I found this place I had no idea what to do. Now I do-I set my ENT appt for Thurs. My next Question: What do I ask for in the way of tests? Is there any speciofic order they use as standard procedure-like CT or MRI first, then biopsy or Need Asp? I know if I'm not my own advocate, no one else will be. Just want to be armed Thursday.
Thanks again for your help.I hope you are all recovering well and continue with good health. I know it's been a long road for you.

Marty

Hi Marty,
Tell the Dr you want both the cat scan and MRI. We have found out that we have to tell the Doctors what to do. If the Doctor would of done these tests earlier, we would not have the problems we are having now. Insist on it. Also ask alot of questions.

Good Luck,
Terry

Hello

Well only through experience the needle biopsy confirmed it all for me whilst the CT and MRI scan just confirmed the lump.

Just ask do what you have to do and ensure its gone!

Just another thought a good friend an Oncology nurse when assigned my consultant told me ask lots of questions write them down because he is old school, unless you ask he will not tell, where as some are completely different.

Yes I agree, I think its always worth jotting down symptoms/changes for better or worse between appointments on paper. I found if I didn't type out problems then I would always forget to mention the one that may have been bothering me most as it got overtaken by another issue.
In fact when I had difficluty eating foods they would ask what did I eat, this was even worse if it was the dietician asking and I found it best to take a list as I could never remember off the top of my head as the itmes changed according to my taste buds daily.

Thank you all so much for the great advice. I am writing down my questions and have my ducks in a row when I see the dr tomorrow. I will also first let him share his thoughts regarding testing, but now I know what to ask for if he goes in the 'wait and see' direction. I also have an appt (second opinion) with an ENT Head and Neck Surgeon for Friday.(can't hurt, right?) Do I need to tell him this is a second opinion?
Thanks again for the prompt replies!! Will let you know what happens.
Marty