Hi, My husband aged 56 has just undergone 6 weeks of chemo followed ny 9 weeks of raDiotheraphy to treat tongue and tonsil cancer. He had no real sytoms just a lump came up on the side of his neck. Sugery wasn't offered just aggressive treatment. Suprised at how quickly it all flew by, daily trips to Brighton and back. But I think the hardest part of it all is now. The treatment is over, and i feel we have just been left on our own. He finds it hard to swallow, still has his feeding tube in his tummy. Sleeps most of the time. I feel useless.

Hello Suzie

Despite the treatment being over, it takes a lot out and fatigue/tiredness is a common side effect. The radiation side effects of mucositis, the lack of adequate saliva all can make it painful and difficult to swallow. Start with liquids and soft foods (take the advice from the dietician about suitable foods and speech & language therapist about the swallowing).

The radiation can cause trismus (limitation of mouth opening owing to muscle scarring), so it is a good idea to do some jaw opening exercises daily to counter this possibility. The dry mouth also increase risk of tooth decay, so be meticulous with oral care.

You will find this this post helpful: Oral Care and Radiation Therapy You will also find Maurice's story insightful. Our members should be around soon with advice and support.

Best wishes
Vinod

Good Evening Suzie,
May I be allowed to add a couple of points to Dr. Joshi's advice?
You have not been left on your own by any means, think of it as being given a little respite from the endless round of hospital visits. All the experts are still there and available to offer help and advice, it is there for the asking.
I often think that carers receive little or no recognition for the demands placed upon them and their efforts are usually quietly draconian so don't feel useless I am sure you have done plenty. Take advantage of your husband's longer periods of sleep to relax a little yourself.
Keep Smiling
John

Suzie
After I had finished all my radiotherapy and chemotherapy it was strange thinking I was now on my own. However I was able to keep in touch with the Macmillan nurse and did so via email. Also all I did for the following month was sleep. I finished my treatment on 31/3 and cannot remember much about April I just slept it away. I started taking small sips of water and milk and ate yoghurts. the coolness helped. I also enjoyed complan soups as the weeks went on as they seemed to be better than the fortisips and seemed more like normal food.
I know my husband felt helpless, but to me just him keeping the house going and doing normal things was just what I needed and I was grateful I could just concentrate on getting better.
Just as the weeks flew by when he was having his treatment these weeks will also fly by.

Thanks for your replies. It is just nice to have someone out there who has some idea of what it has and is like. I'll keep checking and let you know how he gets on.
Thanks again
x

Sorry that you have had to join us but welcome anyway. My husband has very similar treatment for very similar condition except that it was in his tongue and had metastasised into his lymph nodes but not in his tonsils. I felt very much the same as you do now. One of our greatest allies was the dietition, who gave great support and help. If you are not already in touch with your McMillian nurse, get in contact as soon as you can.

There is no denying its a long and hard road ahead and things may get worse before they get better but look around this site and you will arm yourself with the knowledge of what to expect, which I found made things much easier.

As John says, try to relax a bit and take care of yourself too. I understand the you feel useless because you feel there nothing you can do but what you can do is encourage your husband to stay positive and even on those dark days when you dont feel positive, believe me there will be quite a few, let him think you are.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, after diagnosis in March 2007, I never thought life would ever return to normal and although it hasn't improved my husband"s DIY skills and he won't be doing anything in the Olympics he has a normal life again.

Please let us know how you progress, there is always someone here who got the tee shirt ages ago.

It has been good to read messges from you thank you. My husbands work have now stopped paying his wages as he has been off work for so long. Does anyone know what rights he has with a slow phased return to work? Iknow the law has recently changed, he used to do a manual job working outside- his doctor has said he could work from home on the computer but his work say they have nothing he could do!

Hello Suzie

Sorry for delay in answering your question. ( I have been moving.) You might find the topic on Financial Help for Cancer Patients (U.K.) helpful. Your local Macmillan nurse should also be able to provide you with useful information.

Best wishes
Vinod