Hi there,

I am 37yrs old and I have just recently been diagnosed with mouth cancer and have today received the news that i will be having my operation on saturday 6th September. I have very good support from my family, husband and 5 beautiful children. But i am trying to be strong for everyone involved but am finding it
really difficult to stay strong. I am really scared.

Hi Rachel

I really don't know if I can be much help to you as I have always been rather blase to the whole cancer thing.

As I always say, cancer is a fact of life and until a cure is found for it, everyday people are going to be told that they have got it. When I was told I had it, it was a case of "oh well" and at the MDT meeting all I could do was crack jokes...much to the concern of the dozen or so people there!

Still, we are all different and handle life in different ways. To me, cancer is just another one of lifes little experiences that we have to put up with. You may not feel like smiling much and it may even hurt to at times, but if you can catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror with a smile on your face, it will make you feel so much better.

At one stage, during R/T and chemo, I had my head down the loo with yak coming out of my mouth and nose and didn't know whether to laugh or cry...so I did both!!

The one thing that you must remember is that we are all different and handle our treatment differently. You can have twins with the same cancer and the same treatment and they can both have completely different outcomes. Don't make the mistake of meeting someone who has gone through the same cancer as you and think that that's what is going to happen to you...it doesn't work like that.

If you ever need some support or words from us lot, don't sit at home in silence, get on here and have a rant...better out than in! If you are not happy with any facet of your treatment then ask questions, don't automatically assume that those in charge have the definitive answers or know everything. If you do have to spend even one night in hospital make sure you take a eyeshade and a set of ear plugs...it'll help you get a better nights kip.

Keep in touch with us all. Take care.

Ray

Hi Racheal, I know you must feel very scared right now and confused about how you got it but dont think there is an answer.
Waiting for the operation in itself fear of the unknown.
You dont say where you have the Cancer or what type but I was sso nieve I thought I would have the operation and come home the next day wow did I get a shock whe I woke.
If you post what type of Cancer you have people can help with thier expersinces will not be the same as you but very simalar.
Well at this monet all I can do is say be strong and there is life after Cancer as on here proves.
I wish you all the best and please keep in touch and share you fears and problems this is a good place to be for you to get support and maybe some answers to your fears.

Paul

Hi Rachel, you have found the best place for support and answers to any questions you might have but as Ray says, everyone is different. Treatment is hard but in my case, not as hard as I thought it would be. Try and stay strong as a positive attitude really helps. Hagg.

Hi Rachel,

Well its gonna be tough but worth it! I found out 08/01/08, have been through an operation, radiotherapy and chemo and was back to work on Monday!

Be strong girl and remember we are here for you.

As Paul says - let us know where your cancer is and people who have been through that particular type can support you. Mine was in my tonsil and is gone now - yipee!

Good luck

Love Chloex

Purple Kitten - I just had a WTH moment!

As you probably know, on this side of the pond we put the month and date in reverse order than the way you do. Reading your message my way, you began your treatment on August 1, 2008, and in one month's time had surgery, chemo and RT AND you're back to work already - WOW! Wonder Woman is among us.

It took a few seconds to realize what I'd done. You still have a Wonder Woman quality to you though.

Rachel,

It can be pretty tough treatment but - and I do mean this sincerely - the fear is sometimes the hardest thing to deal with. It's wonderful that you have the support system you do. You said,

quote:

... i am trying to be strong for everyone involved but am finding it really difficult to stay strong.

It's probably important to maintain a facade for your children, but I found it necessary to have one or two people that I could admit my fears and pains to - bottling it in helps no one, particularly yourself. It's another great thing about this message board - there's always someone here to talk to.

I told Mum (a terrific poster and caregiver on this board) that I missed my own Mum/Mom and wish I could put my head in her lap and hear her say, "Shhh, Mimi. Everything's going to be all right." Mum said she'd be glad to play that part. That's great therapy! Find yourself someone you can do that with.

Take care Rachel. I wish you and your family the best.

Mimi

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Mimi McC,

Hello Rachel, sorry to have you on board and whilst we don't want to have you here you will find you are very very welcome to all the help all us tee shirt owners can give (been there etc)

Give us more details, let us know how things are going.

Stay focused, Stay strong.

Hi Rachel

So sorry to hear your news. It is a scary time but, as angiebaby says, there are plenty of us on here who have been through it and can offer you friendship and support.

Will be thinking of you on September 6th. Keep your courage up - you are being strong.

All best wishes
Gwyn

To answer Paul's question I have the cancer in my right cheek. I really do appreciate all ur comments, u have just made me cry so much i don't think that i will stop.

I will keep u informed but obviously not for a while.

Thank u all once again xx

Hi Rachel,

I was just diagnosed about 2 weeks ago but had surgery just under a week ago. I was sooo scared before I went in to have it, but then towards the end I just wanted to get in there and have it over with.

I am not sure what surgery you are having, I had the partial glossectomy, and it really was not as bad as I thought it would be. Painful afterwards yes, but I could control that with pain meds. I just still can't eat much because it is hard to swallow, but hey I can stand to lose some weight

Hi Rachel

I've recently had an operation on my left cheek and has been said before,waiting and thinking about the op was the worst part for me,the actual operation and recovery was quite pain free,like myself at 37 your still quite young so you should heal quickly.

Hope eveything goes well

Scott

I will be thinking of you during your surgery

Hi, Rachel. I'm new to the board myself but was diagnosed with cancer on my tonsil back in dec. I've been through the radiation and chemo and am now cancer free. I too felt the need to be the strong one for my family but having held everything in for so long all the stress and everything piled up so I've been having terrible pain in my neck and back and headaches. You just have to let go once in a while and let your family be strong for you. My family has been wonderful and I wish I had leaned on them a little more.
Best wishes to you in these trying times,
DavidR

Thinking of you today Rachel.

Thanks for your comments Mimi McC. I could even get away with wearing the Wonder Woman outfit now I've lost 35lbs! Sorry I confused you!

Love Chloex

Dearest Chloe,
Why did you reveal your secret identity? Super heroines are not supposed to do that!!
Lots and lots of love, xxx and hugs.
Ananth