My grandfather is 86 and has had years of radiation and surgery for oral cancer. He just found out he has to have 1/2 of his jaw removed..the doc thinks it is risky. What is going to happen and how long are we looking at if he opts out of the surgery. We meet with the doc again next week to discuss, but I want to be prepared for things. He has had a stroke back in 87 and has trouble communicating anyway!

Kelli, God Bless you and your Grandfather. I don't know what lies in store for him, it isn't going to be easy tho, I will tell you this. I was given 3 months or jaw replacement. I took the jaw replacment. That was 3 years ago, I am still alive, and without CANCER. But I am also half od your grandfathers age. Listen to the Doctors, ask questions...ANY & ALL the questions that you want to ask...ASK them now,, because after----it is tooooo late....U R in my prayers.....Vicki Lynn

Your words are so encouraging and thank you for reaching out to me today when I just found out this horrible news! I cannot tell you how much we have gone through with this...HE HAS GONE THROUGH! He is a very private man especially since his stroke(87). It affected his communication...he knows what he want to say but it doesn't always come out right. Hence, he needs us (my mom, particularly) to go to Dr. visits, etc. Now, I am involved! I have to be! I cannot believe this is happening..it is so unfair- this is the man that documents his 12 minute treadmill walks twice a day and has never missed a day for the last year! He's had the trach, the radiation...I think he is done and I am just sick. Please help me know what to expect!

by the way...Thank you for the 3 month without surgery comment from your dr. I just wanted to know what could be coming from our dr. and I appreciate that fact. That gives me insight... God bless you.

Kelli, I must tell you up front, I will not powder puiff things, I will not lie to you. I didn't want it when I asked questions, so please do not be or get upset with me, for telling you the truth or like it is...Okay? I am a very very nice person I am proud to be able to say. I wouldn't hurt anyone never ever never. Sweetheart I don't know what lies in store for your Grandpa. You see in my eyes it doesn't matter if he is 62 or 87, he is still PaPa. The love you feel for this tower of a man that has touched your life so deep and forever is very sick and could very well be dying. This is sad. I only know what the Doctors told me. The CANCER had began to eat into my right side jaw bone. It had made its way almost to my chin. It had to come out. It was the most gut wrenching painful tear jerking experience of all my surgeries. And I have had about 15 to date. I cannot eat ever again. I can talk but it took over a year of rehab to do so. I have no tongue tho. It was removed. I did have a trac, for a year. But it was FINALLY taken out. I have a HARD time with breathing tho. I must admit. I will be on a trac again. I know this. But for now I am not. I cannot open my mouth hardly at all. I cannot even get a toothbrush in it. The titanium jaw replacement that they put in has seized up and will not let me open my mouth. Now here is where the real problem lies. Ready? The skin along my jaw line--the titanium is tearing thru it. Therefor I have parts of it exposed. Now I am going to have to go back and have them REMOVE the titanium brace. Now I ask you, why did they put it in--if it wasn't going to work,,Well let me tell you what they told me. They did not think I would live this long.....Yes mamm...I have outlived my replacement surgery time. Talk about in shock. I was.,.My husband was. We were at that very moment in time--without a word. What do you say to that? I still to this day don't know what to say. So I am mad. I am so angry. I haven't been back to see my surgeon. Tho I know I will have to and soon...I just can't now. I just can't. I have seen my CANCER doctor's.. The thought of having to go thru another surgery like this is enough to make me want to end my life. I am not joking about this. Not for one second. Once in a lifetime is more than enough for any living soul....BUT TWICE is just cruel. So Kelli yes you are involved. You always were. Don't you know that if this were you--he would be there for you,,,you bet he would. He would be as upset about this as you are. He is afriad we all are, tho we don't like to admit it. We don't want to make it harder on our loved ones. Get some paper and a pen and have him write down what he wants to know. Then someone ask the Doctor for him. He may not be able to get those words out properly but he can write. You do the same. I have ALWAYS wrote my questions done at my house. That way I never forgot anything. It seems like once you get into that office--the mind just goes on vacation...Please keep me posted on PaPa....They are special aren't they,,,,Grannie's too...Always Vicki Lynn

My grandfather has also spoken of ending things before he has to suffer through anymore also, so I know where you are feeling that way. You have been through so much! I really wish you the very best...shame on that Dr. for assuming you would not be here and not doing it correctly the first time. As if this cancer does not bring on enough depression and anger...I am so sorry you have to face this again. You are in my prayers. I will let you know how things go Friday. Yes, we will definitely be writing questions (and the answers!) down. Thank you for your honesty and forthcoming information. I really needed some insight. God bless you.