Hello folks,

first let me introduce myself.
My name is Michael. I am 56 years of age,
a librarian living in southwestern Germany
near the major US Airbase at Ramstein, the
nearest major city being Kaiserslautern.
I myself am a 17 year survivor of a liposarcoma
in my right thigh (had to part with my leg
though).
But this post is really about my wife.
I am terribly worried that she might be
suffering from cancer of the mouth.
She has just turned 57, non-smoker.
Around Christmas she discovered a small, red
discolouring on the floor of her mouth.
We were quite alarmed, and went straight to
the Oral Clinic of the University of the
Saarland at Homburg.
The doctor had a look, said it most probably
was a blockage of some sublingual gland, and
my wife might come back two weeks later -
without any sign of urgency.
Back home we carefully scrutinised the squibbs
of all the medications my wife was taking at
that time. We discovered that one squibb listed
as rare side effect changes in the mucous
membranes of the mouth.
Naturally and somewhat relieved we concluded
that this must be the obvious cause of the
inflammation / swelling. My wife stopped
taking the pill concerned, and we expected the
'spot' to disappear eventually.
Unfortunately, it has not done so.
So yesterday we went to Homburg again.
A senior consultant had a look, and now my
wife has an appointment for MRIs next
Wednesday. I am surprised they did not perform
a biopsy right away, but I suppose they are
waiting for MRI scans, before they decide on
what to do next.
Of course, I still hope it might be benign.
My wife and I have been married for 27 years,
and I cannot bear the thought of losing her to
cancer, this kind of cancer in particular.
The fact that I have been a lifelong sufferer
from bipolar disorder does not help my present
state of mind and anxiety.
I have no contact with my family (mother), and
my wife is my best friend. (quite apart from
the fact that as an amputee I rely on help).
I am on permanent anti-depressant medication,
and I have taken small doses of a sedative to
help me sleep and calm me down.


Thanks for listening.
Keep your fingers crossed for my wife's sake.

Love,

Mike Germany

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Mike, Germany,

Mike. Our thoughts are with you at this time and we hope and pray that your wife is clear of Cancer. And of course, if ever you feel the need to let off steam or share your worries on here we will always listen and respond. Try not to get over stressed Mike and keep us informed of your wife's progress.
Take care.

Dear Steve,

many thanks for your kind message.
I have been active in a couple of forums:
Bipolar Disorder, Sarcoma & Amputee Forums
and I have won a few dear new friends in the
process. This time I did not eloborate on my
personal background, because it's not me, but
my wife that seems to be afflicted by this
horrible type of cancer.
Reading what you all have been through has
given me quite a shock, and I only hope my
wife will be spared some of the worst
scenarios like extensive reconstructive
surgery and neck dissection.
We lost valuable time which may cost my wife
her life.
We did the right thing when we consulted the
specialised University Clinic right away.
But when the examining doctor told us it was
only a blocked gland, we thought, he should be
able to recognise a cancer when he sees one
and mistook this "diagnosis" for the all-clear
that it was not. Instead of telling us to
definitely see him again after two weeks, he
vaguely suggested to my wife: "If you want,
you can come by again two weeks from now."
If only his instruction had been firmer and
unequivocal.
But it's no use crying over spilt milk, is it?

Next Wednesday my wife will have MRI scans of
the floor of the mouth and the neck.
I shall keep you posted.

In the meantime,
take care & God Bless!

Kind regards,

Mike

P.S. Give my love to your family and loved
ones.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Mike, Germany,

Hello Mike

I gather that no definite diagnosis has yet been made as they would need a biopsy for this. You might be worrying unduely as they may be suspecting a stone or other salivary gland diagnosis for which the MRI might help make the diagnosis. Just call them and ask them what they suspect. It might save you the worry.

Best wishes
Vinod

Hello Vinod,

many thanks for your kind, comforting words.
Of course, only a biopsy can establish certainty.

But even though I myself have survived cancer, I would not
characterise myself as being an optimist.

I promise I shall keep you all posted on future developments.
Let us hope that my wife will be spared the ordeal.

Nevertheless wishing you and yours

a great summer weekend

With kind regards,

Mike

Dear Mike,

You are not alone. Many of us have experienced the gripping fear that is overwhelming you now. It can be all-encompassing, I know. My husband, Danny, (cancer-free for 1.5 years) just visited his doctor yesterday. When they did a scope down his throat, a "questionable" red area was discovered. So, we are now in the waiting mode (for the next four weeks) before scheduled to return to the clinic for another look. If the redness has not subsided, we may be dealing with a cancer recurrence, God forbid! I am beside myself with worry and grief... trying desperately to be calm and optimistic, but failing miserably. I manage to be brave in my Danny's presence, but cry often in private. These next weeks will be misery until we know something more.

Danny and I were married 20 years this month. Like you and your wife, we are best friends too. I cannot comprehend life without him. As you so well know, having suffered through cancer yourself, FEAR becomes a part of everyday life. Fear of the unknown... fear of recurrence... fear of pain... fear of death... fear of being left alone. It becomes a daily challenge just dealing with the negative thoughts that tend to "creep in"... when you KNOW darn well that it is so nonproductive (retarded!) to worry about that which you do not know... or cannot control anyway. My logical brain tells me to be happy and live each day with Danny to the fullest... my irrational brain spends far too much time contemplating the "what if's".

I know that what you read on line (including some of the postings within this forum) can be chilling... but there are as many positives and success stories as not. Try your level BEST to focus on the positives. I vow along with you to do the same, Mike. Tonight I will pray with all of my energy and all of my being that your precious wife and my dear husband will NOT have cancer! I just have to trust that God will hear my cries for mercy. Until medical tests reveal the answers we need, we MUST stay strong for our spouses and control the racing thoughts that plague us. Love is so powerful, Mike... and, in spite of all we've been through... I STILL believe in the power of prayer and God Almighty.

Please know I am with you in spirit, sending my BEST to you and your wife across many, many miles... KEEP THE FAITH along with me, Mike! What more can we do? Please post news when you can, and I'll do the same.

From my heart,

Melanie

Hello Mike, I am so sorry to hear of your worrying news relating to your wife. This is a very difficult time for you both...the waiting game is always the worst part, but as your wife is having her scan next week you shouldn't have too long before you have the results and know exactly what you are dealing with. I know that reading some of the case histories on this site can be frightening when you are looking for answers, but please remember there will be many thousands of people who have been successfully treated for blocked saliva glands and other disorders of the mouth with no further problems.

I am wishing and praying for a benign result. Keep us informed. With warm wishes Brenda.

Dearest Brenda,

many thanks for your kind and comforting
words.
Of course, I do hope that it might turn
out just to be a blocked saliva gland.
If the MRI scans should be positive however,
let us hope that the cancer has not spread yet
and not infiltrated too deeply into the floor
of the mouth, also that the tongue is not
involved.
The next logical step would have to be a
biopsy, I suppose.
I shall keep you posted.
Thanks again.

Take care!
God Bless!

Mike, Germany

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Mike, Germany,