Hello, everybody. I've been visiting this site since first diagnosed with oral cancer in July 2004 but only now feel able to post a message. A quick summary of my story so far then - I'm 43 years old, female, never smoked and apart from a bit of a wild time in my 20's, drink only moderately. It came as a huge shock therefore when I was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma which had spread from my gum to my jaw in July 2004, especially when the surgery was explained to me - neck dissection, removal of a large section of my lower jaw and reconstruction with bone graft from my fibula.

Still I got through it all with the help from my wonderful husband and parents - with 2 children aged 7 and 10 at the time - I felt I had to keep going and was determined to get back to "normal" life. The 30 sessions of radiotherapy were tough but thankfully, I did get back to a normalish diet although the constant soreness on my tongue I found depressing and there were times when it was just too difficult to eat properly.

All was going well - I went back my part-time work at a local 6th form college, finally did some exercise by learning to swim and doing a 5 km fun run in September. My scars were fading and my energy levels were almost back to normal. I hate this to sound like "poor me" but it was more than distressing when I discovered a lesion in my cheek just above the site of the original tumour in late October of this year which of course turned out to be cancerous.

Late November saw me once more in the operating theatre when the old incision was opened up and the tumour removed. I was told that because of having already had radiotherapy to that area, they had to be quite radical and take a good chunk of tissue away surrounding the tumour and to fill in the hole constructed a flap taking tissue and blood supply from my forearm.

Thankfully, everything has gone really well and I was home really quickly and managed to have a wonderful Christmas with my family. I have to say I feel more emotionally than physically battered now and am very uncertain about the future. On the one hand, I feel very grateful just to be back home and more or less in one piece. On the other hand, it is so frustrating to be back in this position again and wondering what I have in my power to prevent this terrible illness from re-occurring.

Anyway, congratulations if you've managed to read to the end of this - sorry to rattle on for so long. I'd be grateful for any comments, tips etc. Some of the stories on this website are incredibly inspiring and I am amazed by the good humour which so many of you seem to possess.

My best wishes to you all.
Sue E

Hello, I can imagine that when you were in the thick of 'OPs, rad treatment, you were not up to writing. BIG BEAR HEALING HUGS

Hello Sue

This cancer journey is so tough! The only control cancer travellers have is of how they do this journey; there is no knowable destination in time. So take each day at a time, savour it for it gives, and the things it allows you to do. There are many courageous people on this board who will help pick you up if you stumble. You may find Vicki's story encouraging.

Best wishes
Vinod

Hi, Garance and Vinod,

Just wanted to say thanks for your messages and support. I'm trying to take your advice about taking one day at a time - I used to be someone who was always planning ahead so it's hard but while I'm still regaining my strength it seems to be the only way to handle life.

Thanks again and best wishes
Sue