Hi, for those of you who do not know I am Mike McNulty's (Pikeman) daughter. If I can lend any support to any of you I will. If I can give any advice I will. Please feel free to contact me if you feel I can be of any help to you.

Veronica xx

Hi Veronica, firstly let me once again offer my condolences about your farther. Mike was the first person I met who had head and neck cancer and gave me a reason to fight. When I went in for my operation he used to visit me. he was a lovely man and as I previously said I am privlidged to have known him.

Maurice thankyou for your kind words and thoughts......I know my dad kept you in his thoughts and thought of you daily........My dad did feel privilidged to have know you, if only for a short while.......I hope this message finds you well and fighting all the way....My thoughts are with you. xx

Hello Veronica, I know that I do not have to tell you a thing about the wonderful and powerful man that you have spent your lifetime calling---DAD....Yet I cannot help but to say that he was a kind and gentle spirit to and for me. I know that I am better because of the brief but heartfelt time I knew of him..It would please him so to have you come on here and speak to and with us..What a legacy this man has left in his wake..With all that said I would like to ask about your Mother...How is she doing? Please let her know that I am thinking of her...Your father adored her so...You just have wonderful role models don't you...Most people are blessed to have one,,,you were truly blessed to have two...Always,,,Vicki Lynn

I found out so much more about my dad after his death Vicki Lynn, which made his passing even harder. It made me so proud of him to know that he made a negative a positive path....The one thing I still remember his last day - the suffering he endured that day was unbearable - but not once did he make any attempt to complain...he was so brave and dignified.....My mum seems to be dealing with his loss OK - but I think deep down there is a huge gap in her life now - I think she also realises how much she loved him now that he is not here...Mum cared for him for the 4 years he was ill but more especially these last 2 years as his illness progressed....Of all of us Vicki Lynn it is me who has the hardest time dealing with this loss - I despair of the fact that I can never talk with him, laugh with him, be told off by him, see him smile, watch my little girl be so tender with him, and see that love returned to her..........I am so sorry this reply is sad but it is how I feel about my wonderful dad.....Every single one of you on here is a brave person, with hope, dignity and a depth of kindness and understanding few people ever have or will ever know. I am honoured to be able to converse with you all...I will pass on to my mum your very kind words which she will find supportive....Stay strong..........Much Love, Veronica xxx

Veronica, What a wonderful person you are. These next few days, weeks, months will be so hard for you..It has been over 20 years since I lost my parents,,,,20 years...They say it will get better...I don't believe in that saying at all..I think it gets better because "we" find a place to put the pain..I honestly feel that we have all these little rooms inside us..There are rooms for everything that you have stored in memory..This may sound silly to you but this is the only reason I can think of that we can handle all the ups and downs that life throws at us..There is no way I could handle all of this if it was right on the top of my mind every single day...24/7..There has to be a place to put it so I can function..There are days that I can think about them and laugh then there are days that I cry all day long..But you know it is allright..Because I loved them so much. They were taken from us so young..We had to grow without them,,,I would like to think they would be proud of each one of us..I wanted them to be proud of me and to love me,,,,which they did...Your father was very proud of you..and the little you ( your daughter)..We learn so much in life,,,we also learn so much in death....that is the one thing I like about this site...We can laugh, cry, talk, yell, scream and so on & on.....These are things we have to do to cope with all the lemons that this world throws at us....Unless you can catch them....ALways Vicki Lynn

Such wise words.........I completely garee about the rooms within us..........I have many rooms Vicki Lynn, and have now created a special one for my dad.......I am so sad for your loss.......to lose both parents whilst you are young is a tragedy in itself.....how brave you are, and so kind and understanding....Life is a complete roller coaster and we have to learn to go with the flow and take everything that is thrown at us to make us the strong people we are......Through adversity we learn the hardest but most valuable lessons....Making sense of death and the loss it creates is difficult and most certainly an uphill struggle....I know my dad would not want us to mourn him to such a degree that it affetced our lives - so in his memory I will be strong and try my best to help others and support others - as you all do here - this site and the people here were his passion and I thank you all so much for being with him in spirit....You are right that it never really gets easier, we just learn to deal with that pain better - my little girl put a note in dad's coffin which said "I hope you have a good time in Heaven, I will miss you - see you some day"....that is a 7 year old's mind at work - I thought that was beautiful and showed a strength of being that dad would have been proud of.
I will keep coming back here as I find comfort in your words Vicki Lynn and the wonderous postings relating to my dad.
Be strong and be happy, With Love, always Veronica xx

HI Veronica, It's Cathy so sorry for your loss.
I'm glad that you came on the site. Take care.
Cathy

Hi Cathy, thank you so mush for taking the time to reply.......I have this site to be a welcome relief, supportive and eye opening.....people here are kind, understanding, tolerant and so supportive.....Glad to be on board. Have a great weekend and take care.
Veronica xx