its 11:56pm here in Toronto canada,on july 14 as i sit here in tears with questons un answered. my dad have a large part of his tonuge removed and lymph node also yesturday. i saw him the day of the surgery and he seemed really good. he even tried to speak and i understood his words. now the next the (today) was different, he couldnt speak, he wrote that could make himself swallow, im just down right scared, my mom was with him all day, she has always been the strong one, but she is so weak, it scares me...is this normal, is it the sweeling, how long does it last...Please shed some light on this for me? Anyone please...

Good Morning,"for my dad"
sixteen months ago I had major oral surgery and removal of all fifty odd lymph nodes from the right side of the neck,thirty six hours later I surfaced and was pleasantly surprised that I didn't feel too bad at all,a lot better than I expected. My wife and daughter came to see me and they too were pleasantly surprised. The next day I didn't feel too good and the day after even worse ,I discussed this with the consultant and he said that this was quite normal,usually day one was ok then there was a decline for three days or so and positive progress thereafter, and that is exactly what happened.The euphoria on day one is partly due to the fact that the worry of the operation is now past and you have survived.The effect of the anaesthetic takes a day or two to fully clear,even though morphine is being fed by a drip you become aware of the differences and discomforts and of course the shock to the system of surgery on this scale doesn't clear instantly.You may think it unlikely right now but in a week the difference will be surprising, most (or all) of the drips and drains will have been removed and your dad could well be walking a few steps.but I should add the note that every one is different some of us take longer than others.Don't let things get you down your dad needs you to be strong and remember to take care of your mum she may not show the worry but it is still there.Talk to the medical staff they are used to helping with these sort of problems. Please keep us posted on your dad's progress and remember that everyone on this web site knows axactly what you are talking about because we are all mouth cancer patients or close relations of.we all wish your dad and your mum and you all the best
Keep smiling
John.

thanks so much john, i wasnt really part of any the whole surgery at all...we have a family bussniess that i had to take care of, so im out in the dark about everything. I dont think my parents asked enough questions eithier. im going to see him tonite and try to get there early enough to see the doctor.ill keep you posted on his progress. again thanks for relpying as it really took a load off my chest to hear it from someone thays been there