Hi there, my name's Amy and my sister Kelley has been diagnosed with tongue cancer twice in her life... I guess i came on just to see how you guys are coping because i don't think i'm doing a very good job myself (not that there's a right and wrong way or anything). It's just that i feel so god damn helpless and can't really do one iota to help Kell. She's kinda retreated and thinks that coping by herself is the best way. She's so very independent which is something that i love about her, but everyone has their limits and i think Kell is reaching hers, i just don't know how to help? Kell is eight years older than me (she's 30 now and i'm almost 22) and i know she strives to be strong whenever i'm around, which isn't as nearly as often as i would desperately like to be... It seems the majority of you have loving and supporting families, but what happens when what you do isn't enough? Kell feels as though her family isn't there for her and i guess i'm not at the moment, i feel like i'm waiting on the side lines but can't get in there without the go ahead from Kell... i don't know, mayb i'm just the weak one who needs to be a hell of a lot stronger. Sometimes it's like she thinks everyone can just go back to their normal lives and forget she had cancer, but she lives with it day in day out...i want to be there for her and there's never a day that i don't think about Kell, but to tell her that isn't enough and i'm lost as to how i go about proving it. Sorry for whinging, my problems are so minute compared to what you must be going through. I commend your bravery and determination and wish each and every one of you well, wherever you are on your road to recovery.
If anyone is interested, Kell has a web page www.caringbridge.com/ok/kelley that will touch your hearts, i'm sure, and i'm not just saying that cause i'm her sis!!
Thanks again for taking the time to read this, and all the best
Ames xx

Hi Ames

I have read some of Kelleys messages on this board and didnt realise that she had been diagnosed twice. Is she undergoeing treatment at the moment.

I was diagnosed with tongue cancer feburary 2003 at the age of 19. I can completely understand how you feel, I think its really easy for a cancer patient to feel alone, but I am sure that Kelley knows just how much you care about her (your message shows that). If want to email me as I am now 21 so a similar age to you please let me know and I can send you my email address.

Take Care
Clare xx

That would be great Clare! I think i sent you a msg privately but don't know if it got through? My first time on here so still working out the kinks! My email addy is amygoodrich82@hotmail.com jus in case you didn't get the last msg...
Hope to hear from you soon
Cheers
Ames