The first thing he is going to bring me,is my son who will arrive tonight from Queensland. That's very special.
My neice will arrive from the Northern Territory tomorrow morning.
My other three children, who all live close handy will be here as will my father and my brother.
That's really something to look forward to, having everyone here however my very best present this year (I don't usually like to know about gifts in advance, they have to be a surprise) is my husband. He may be half the man he used to be, size wise however he is here, hale and hearty and I couldn't wish for more than that.
I LOVE Christmas! I also love the weather forecast ~ only 28 degrees. Ahhhhhhh, bliss. 20 would be better however anything under 30 at this time of year is a real bonus.
Deborah

Hello all my amigos y amigas,
So finally we have crossed the Christmas of 2007 and now await the toll of the bells clanging to bring in the New Year. Just another few days and we are into 2008. Its amazing how 2007 has passed by so quickly and with so much happening. Some fantastic news, some good news, some bad,and some just news. We have had a lot of happiness and joy that we were and are still able to enjoy life together and I for one have no doubt -(with all the sparring) will always have friends forever. I honestly do not think I have felt so deeply for anyone as each one here at rdoc and I would like to thank you all for the great support you all have given me.

My epic saga will carry on as its now time to contemplate on the future and what I still have to do. My last couple of weeks have given me a lot of happiness but also a lot to think about. Almost all of you'll were right in your thoughts that I was a "cad" - who did not think of women as human but just something to play with and throw aside when done with. I was told this a long time ago that I would live to regret it but then who really listens when things are going great and you do not have to do anything but have the "girls' taking a fancy to you. I do think now, I should have stopped all my extra curricular activities once I got married to Sonya, whatever the circumstances. Dolores in fact was not there when I was completely smashed up after the bike accident and things just began to slide on that front, due to my long stay in the hospital. As I had said but not completed it was a part of my grand mother and Sonyas mother to get me hooked up and when I think back, I feel sorry for Sonya that she got stuck with a guy like me. She tells me very often that had she known about my life en todo - there was no way she would have wanted to marry me. I completely agree with her as I was not the kind to be a married man and I still feel the same way. My mother and Aunts even on date side with Sonya and give me the brunt of being the worst thing that could have happened to Sonya.

Its not just my wild ways with women (no wine) and song that made me not a good choice to get married too but funnily enough my passion for my work. Throughout my working life, I have always put work ahead of almost everything and just as I wanted the best of material things, I also wanted to be known as a success in my work. I guess the timing was not right and finally snapped when in 2000 the cancer came along.

People have the impression when they see me that I was an extra brave person to have faced upto the cancer and fought it, to overcome it finally.I honestly do not think that was ever the case.I think to some extent that I survived it the first time was because of my attitude(to hell with it attitude), a little bit of luck, a lot of love from a lot of people and shocked look in both Varuns and Arjuns eyes. Even today - when I am sleeping or just have my eyes closed one of them will come along and wake me up - they are scared and I do not blame them after what they have seen me go through. Noone in Barcelona, has seen how bad I was -so noone can really pass any judgements and I do not expect them to. As I mentioned above the time has come to contemplate on my future actions and much as it hurts, I need to get back to India and be there with my mother, Sonya and the two boys. I have settled everyone at this end and I really do not forsee any major upheavels in anyone life in quite some time to come. I only hope they all live like a family and not fight over the smallest of things. I will try and bring Dolores to India - but again thats a big question mark and will see about it later. The idea at the moment is to spend more time with my two sons - who are just about growing up and need a Dad around not just to guide them but also to watch them grow and give them that encouragement that I had not been able to give them ever since they were born (my constant travelling, working long hours and finally the cancer). I think this break in my life has come as something I should have done years ago and not at the cost of what I am going through even today.

My life has been one which not many people will believe or imagine that one can lead in this short period - but then that is their conclusion and I have no intentions of explaining all my deeds and doings. However, to everyone here - I would like to menntion that every thing I have written and posted is the truth and nothing but the truth. When I think back over the years, I see glimpses of all the people I have used and thrown aside or trampled upon has now begun to take its effect - as I do feel curses do work and when I think of the number of curses - it should be the reason for the pain and misery I am going through today. Fo a guy who would really enjoy the best of food - coming down to not being able to eat anything or drink has to be the biggest curse. Th entire cancer has left me in a limbo and he sooner this chapter closes the better it will be. I have no idea why I work out so hard when the result is going to be the same - the only difference I guess, I will be a corpse with a good six pack abs and a great V shaped body but thats all.

I have loved my life and I have no regrets fro my end but certainly feel a bit sorry for the people I said I had used and those I had trod upon - but on a scale of 1 to 10 - I would give myself a 9 for my having led the life I did. Its been a full life- full of everything. I managed to scale heights that my father expected from me and I hope when we meet up next he will pat me on the back ( Who knows he may even have a cigarette ready for me on arrival!!).

Well, I guess enough of nostaligia and feelings of yesteryear which will never ever return again.Some feelings so strong that you wonder where did you go wrong to have been cheated out and the same applies to when one thinks on how one got it back in some other form.

Let me end this boring post here - but not before thanking each and everyone for their love, advise and the happiness you have brought me.This is something I will always treasure and relax well knowing I have some great freinds all over the world.

Take care my friends,
With all my love (Vinod- please note- lots and lots of HUGS) and plenty of smooches for the great women here.
Ananth