Hi there everyone I have just been to visit my dear old mum today as it is her 85th birthday I should be happy as this is a great age however I am writing this just sobbing as I am shocked by what I have seen today in her mouth.
I will start at the begining to put you fully in the picture it would be around 16 years ago when my daughter was around 10 at the time she was combing her nanas hair and putting slides in,mum was joking with her and kept taking her teeth out.
I heard my daughter say nana you have 2 new teeth growing,mum laughed and then told me she had 2 white lumps in her mouth on her gums at the left hand side and she had them a while.
I asked if she had shown the doc but she shrugged it off no more was said about it for years.
However just lately perhaps over the last year mum has been saying she has a sore throat and whilst on holiday with her in may I noticed a hugh weight loss 2 stone to be exact she told she was having difficulty swallowing and was off her food, all week she was tired and rarely left her room..I again asked her to see the doc, it was at this point she told me she was not going to do anything about it as she was to old,I asked her what she meant she told me she knows she has cancer..we have been trying to get her to visit the doc but she is scared and says that there is nothing they could do for her.
Today when I saw her she has lost another half a stone and says she is coughing up blood and her legs and feet are swelling.
But the big shock to me was the size of the lump in her mouth which has grown in the last 3 months she cant get her teeth in and it is clearly visable when she is talking also she cant now eat anything solid and is having to mush food up I asked to see the lump and the only way I can explain it is it looked like a cauliflower with white stringy bits on it which she says break off in her mouth...I am worried sick and even though 85 is a wonderful age to reach I dont want to see her like this..is there a possibility that it may be cancer or could it be something else?
If it is cancer will they insist on treatment? as she says she cant be bothed with all that and would not survive a opperation.
She has agreed to see the doctor next week!!
Thank for your time reading this I feel better just writing it down..any help or advice would be great..Pheonixx a very worried daughter.

Hello Phoenixx

Sorry to hear about your mother. It may not be cancer but it is best to get it seen to as soon as possible.

The doctor can visit your mother at home and if he suspects a cancer he can arrange for an immediate referral to the local hospital's maxillofacial unit (fast track wait is maximum wait of 2 weeks, usually seen sooner if urgent). Even if the tumour is advanced, they can arrange palliative treatment and care to shrink the tumour and keep her comfortable. Hope that helps.

Let us know how things work out.

Best wishes
Vinod

Thank you so much for your reasurance and advice..my sister cares for my mum so I will have a word with her..and may I thank you for taking time to help people it's wonderful thank you...I will keep you updated..pheonixx

Hi just a quick update my sister went to the docs this morning and explained about mum he visited her today and had a good look at her at 1.30 and by 3pm she was having a chest x ray so we are now waiting to hear something from what or who we dont know but at least she has been looked at and if she gets some help to make her comfi then thats great..thats all I know for now but with the speed that everything that was done, I think we can say mum has cancer and I have a feeling that she will leave me soon but I am preparing for that..I will keep you informed thank you for listening it helps..Pheonixx

Hi Phoenixx, just read your posts, your poor mum, I look after my dad who's 88, so I know what they're like about doctors etc!! Please let us know how your mum's doing. Lots of brave wishes, Jus

Thank you Jus that is kind of you to write to me..hugs to you and your dad...Phe