Good to see you back Maurice,I need your support with the jokes,My last few have performed like concrete airships,I need your contributions to spur me on. try this one as a starter.
a chap hobbled into the pub on crutches nursing a broken arm, two black eyes,swollen lips and multiple bruises. His mate asked what happened and was told "Oh it's this tickly cough"
Give over, tickly coughs don't cause that lot!
They do if you are in the wardrobe when her husband comes home.
Keep Smiling
John

It had me giggling! You certainly haven't lost your touch John. All good wishes to you and your family for a happy Christmas and healthy New Year.