>
>An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies
>of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favourite
>Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs.
>
>Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed.
>Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and
>with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands he
>crawled downstairs. With laboured breath, he leaned
>against the doorframe,gazing into the kitchen.Where if not for death's
>agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there,
>spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds
>of his favourite anisette sprinkled cookies.
>
>Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted
>Italian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a
>happy man?
>
>Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table,
>landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the
>wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth,seemingly bringing
>him back to life.
>
>The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at the edge
>of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his
>wife.....
>

Oh no I've missed the last bit!!
Haven't quite sussed copy, cut and paste!
I'll try again.
sorry!!

>
>An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies
>of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favourite
>Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs.
>
>Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed.
>Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and
>with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands he
>crawled downstairs. With laboured breath, he leaned
>against the doorframe,gazing into the kitchen.Where if not for death's
>agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there,
>spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds
>of his favourite anisette sprinkled cookies.
>
>Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted
>Italian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a
>happy man?
>
>Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table,
>landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the
>wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth,seemingly bringing
>him back to life.
>
>The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at the edge
>of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his
>wife.....
>>
>An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies
>of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favourite
>Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs.
>
>Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed.
>Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and
>with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands he
>crawled downstairs. With laboured breath, he leaned
>against the doorframe,gazing into the kitchen.Where if not for death's
>agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there,
>spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds
>of his favourite anisette sprinkled cookies.
>
>Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted
>Italian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a
>happy man?
>
>Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table,
>landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the
>wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth,seemingly bringing
>him back to life.
>
>The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at the edge
>of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his
>wife.....
>Back off!" she said, "They're for the funeral."

Brilliant Sue!
Jennie Sankey

Hi all,
This has nothing to do with cancer nor is it intended to offend anyone. I found it just too funny to keep it hidden away and would love to share it with all of you'll who want a good laugh!

SIPPING VODKA


This is too funny – I still have tears in my eyes! Finally, a chain letter that I don't mind forwarding.



It's funny (don't break chain)



A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.



After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.



The monsignor replied, " When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."



So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice.

At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.



He proceeded to talk up a storm.



Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:

1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.

2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.

3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.

4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.

5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.

6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.

7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spook.

8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the sh*t out of him.

9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.

10)We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T."

11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he said, "take this and eat it for it is my body." He did not say " Eat me" .

12)The Virgin Mary is not called " Mary with the Cherry,.

13)The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.

14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy-pulling contest at St. Peter's not a peter-pulling contest at St. Taffy's.

The Origination of this letter is unknown, but it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on. The one who breaks the chain will have bad luck.

Do not keep this letter. Do not send money just forward it to five of your friends to whom you wish good luck and a great laugh.

You will see that something good happens to you four days from now if the chain is not broken….

Is this Sue Platt from Wales? If it is this is Jennifer Kimmel, me and Mike have been looking for you.

Please e-mail us to let us know you are ok.

jkimmel248@earthlink.net